We have an BREAKING news story. Jeogeot Gulf’s top cryptozoologist Dr. Mai Emurshion claims that a massive monster will appear near the Tulagi waters on 30 and 31 Oktober! Coincidentally that’s the day before and halloween itself!
Dr. Mai Emurshion is calling for massive battlefleet to attack the beast and prevent it from taking over the gulf!
Interview with Dr. Mai Emurshion
Picture above: Dr. Mai Emurshion
Dax Dupont: Welcome Dr. Mai Emurshion. You contacted me over some urgent news. Could you first explain who you are?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: Hello, I’m Jeogeot’s Gulf most renowned cryptozoologist. I’ve been studying the waters in the gulf for a long time.
Dax Dupont: So what’s going on that required my urgent attention?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: I have some startling news! Not too long ago we started picking up signs of a large entity moving around the gulf’s waters so we started to investigate. It’s heading straight for the Tulagi area. We’re certain it will attack the area soon, on the 30th and 31st of this month.
Dax Dupont: … ‘large entity’?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: Yes, it carries the biological signature of what we’d call a Microcosmus marinus or layman’s terms a Kraken.
Dax Dupont: A kraken? Are you serious?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: I’m afraid so.
Dax Dupont: … so how would we defeat one of those?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: We recommend the usage of ships equipped with rounds that are covered in LANCE biomimetic gel which will mimic the biological structure of the kraken itself. You should aim for the tentacles. After destroying a few tentacles it will flee. We expect it to be able to regrow it’s tentacles after fleeing, at least a dozen times. When it does, it will come back.
Dax Dupont: What would we need to watch out for? How would it defend itself?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: It is capable of picking up certain kinds of vehicles and crates. It will use those to defend itself. It’s gonna be very dangerous.
Dax Dupont: So will you be rewarding the people that help defend our waters?
Dr. Mai Emurshion: Yes, we will take the tentacles that fall off and turn them into proof of kill trophies for the person who lands the killing shot.
Dax Dupont: Thanks for the information doctor. I’ll make sure to warn the fleet.
Update: The person who can present the most tentacle trophies before 5 November 2016 to Ghost Menjou gets 3 free weeks of rent for a revetment in Guadalcanal as a price.
Update 2: Top three people can choose a prize from the A-T catalogue.
What vehicles to use??? Is it VICE??? Whats is LANCE Gel??? Hair gel?
Notice how there’s a line under LANCE? Feel free to click it, as that is a link to an explanation of LANCE. There’s also menu options if you hover over the large LANCE on the top of the page.
The gel is a joke 😉